Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
