So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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