the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
