It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
