super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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