I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
