2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
