He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
