drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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