He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
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