he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize