Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Randomize
