My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
two words: eviction party
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
