new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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