So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
there's paper in my vomit.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
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