You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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