So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Randomize
