yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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