please come you make the beer taste better
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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