I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize