"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
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