You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
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