just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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