How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
