return my video game
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize
