So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I think people are normalizing furries
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
