listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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