no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
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