i think i have two assholes
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
