My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
