Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
