It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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