remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
