i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
