There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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