im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
