Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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