using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
