i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
