It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
