Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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