No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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