on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
