I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
