theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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