That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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