What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
FUCK WHALES
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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