I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
