so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize
