the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
